So I talked briefly about Best Friend in the "Men in My Life" blog. B.F. and I met my first year of college. It began when he tried to "holla" at me. As we began to talk, we realized we had so much in common and became the best of friends. We hung out constantly. We went to the movies, to concerts and out to eat together but always as friends. He spent nights at my house, in the same bed. We even joked that if neither of us got married by the time we were 30, we would get married and have a loveless marriage.
He was, basically, my male girlfriend. I could talk to him about anything without worrying about him judging me like everyone else. He was always honest with me.
Then one day, something happened. To this day, I'm still not sure how or why our feelings changed. But anyway, his school is like 6 blocks from my house. So when he got out of class he came to visit me. Everything was cool. We played my Wii (I smashed his ass in bowling) and talked for a bit. I know this sound like its straight out of a corny romance movie but when he was about to leave, we hugged and sparks flew. Something about this hug was different than any other time we hugged. This is th acutual conversation between us after that hug. The conversation that started it all.
Me: Wanna hear somethin funny?
BF: From you? No...
Me: Awwwww :(
BF:I'm kidding...it better be funny though!
Me:(Blank) said u and i should make a pact: if neither of us are married by 30 we should get married and have a baby
BF:You'll be married by 30 I think but that is funny...
Me:How u just gon assume i will be the one thats married????? i think it will be YOU thats married
BF:I don't believe in marriage so that's why we might have to have that pact. LOL! You know I hate commitment and ish.
Me:You dont believe in any damn thing jeez And its gon be some big titty girl who gon come and swoop you off yo feet and make u change yo mind (SN. he's a breast man)
BF:She'll be dumped in a month. Big breasts are only good if the girl is quiet!
Me:In that case maybe we should make that pact lol nobody said we would have to love each other and shit and we can have sex once every three months like a real married couple!!!! Wont that be fun???
BF:Yeah it would! Hide the condom would be fun 4 times a year! But anyway I was thinking about you. I had never wanted you so bad when I walked out that door. (SN this is when it all changed)
Me:(insert flavor flav wooooooooooooooow here) wasnt expecting that
BF:I would go over there now just to be with you but you're fine.
Me:Thought u were allergic to me (SN he's also a hypochondriac who thought he was allergic to every thing)
BF:I was allergic to your son.
Me:Thats still not good
BF:I still want you.
BF:I think it's ok now...he's not sick and I haven't broken out yet.
Me:He also hasnt touch u
BF:True...I want you to touch me tonight though. LOL!
Me:we're refraining from sex remember?
BF:I know right...this shit is trash. We might have to take that back tonight.
Me:As much as i'd like to you know we cant go there (SN should have stuck with my first mind)
BF:I know. I can't stop thinking about you though. I'm going to have to suck it up.
Me:Is it because of the booty videos
BF:No...I'm actually starting to like you. For real for real.
Me:Wow really? are u serious?
BF:Yeah but it's scaring me. With you not really wanting to be like that with me. I don't think you want to cross any lines.
Me:Its not like that i just think u need a little time to grow before entering a serious relationship. i love you (blank) but rite now isnt The time. i dont want for us to try this then it goes all wrong and i lose one of my best friends (SN Can I predict the future or what)
BF:Did you just say...that? I don't want a serious relationship but I want you. Sometimes I just want to be next to you. It's not all about sex.
Me:It wiuld really hurt my heart if i lost u and u werent in my life anymore (SN Miss Cleo who? Call me now!!!!)
BF:It would hurt me too but I lose people all the time. I don't know...I don't feel sensitive to others sometimes but when we hugged I felt something. It wasn't just an erection...it was something from you. It was like it was real...
Me:Well i dont want to beone of those ppl that u lose.
BF:Well I don't know what to say really. Reading these words make me want to come back so we can prove how real this is.
Me:Sex (and lets not fool ourselves thats what we would be havin if you came over here tonite) would only complicate things that are already complicated plus i cant do the casual sex thing anymore
BF:I wouldn't come over there to have casual sex with you. I would make love to you.
Me:Lol stop emo boy. but we have sex then what? go on like nothin happened i cant keep doin that
BF:What?! I was actually serious! I wouldn't act like nothing happened. We can always take it slow. We can't fake like we're nothing but friends anymore. There's something else between us now.
Me:just dont want to coMplicate things with sex plus nothin can happen tonite
BF:Things are already complicated. You want us to hold off on something till I'm ready to be with you which means you want us to be together but you want to be sure.
Me:Exactly
BF:I don't think I can do a real long-term relationship. People in my life change along with me. Whenever I made a change in my life I left people behind and then I would have new friends. I just want us to be close but I don't want us to be serious. However, I'm faliing for you. So I might need some time but that doesn't mean that I don't want you physically.
Me:I really care about you. I didn't think you would even be this interested in me.
Me:sorry dozed off for a min but of course i have feelings for you i been had feelings for you even when u was wit (Bitch ex girlfriend) stuff like that doesnt just go away over night
BF:I didn't know what I was thinking. I was trying to salvage something with her. With you, I know you would treat me right. You would always have my back but I feel like I'm not going to be able to give you what you need.
Me:well when u think ur ready im here
BF:I always try to listen to what you want but sometimes I want to just test it out. Even though you don't like to have casual sex but I want to test you out. :p
Me:Lol test me out? Thats the best line u got
BF:I don't talk dirty over the net. LOL!
Me:Glad u dont cuz apparently you arent good at it
So that's the conversation that got this whole thing started. For the next couple of weeks, we were inseparable and we began to develop a relationship. Everything was good until it went bad.
Part 2 is coming
But in the meantime, have you ever started a relationship with a friend? How did it start? How did it end (if it did end)? Email me @ mizzhopelessromantic@gmail.com. Thanx for reading!
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